i feel like a complete failure..puppy blues

[browndog]

I forgot to mention one other thing that helped us with the puppy-biting part. Apparently puppies learn bite inhibition from interacting with other dogs as they will get bitten/nipped at too and after awhile they see that it hurts and that other dogs won't play with them if they nip. As our puppy is an only-dog, as soon as she had her vaccinations, we took her to dog daycare a couple days a week for further "socialization." There she played with other puppies and even some grumpy older dogs and very soon learned that biting wasn't going to get her anywhere. The other dogs were way more effective at teaching her this than we humans were!

[becka]

I agree--socialization (with other dogs and other people) is key in shaping your puppy's behavior. Sadie went through a really serious (and seriously scary) biting and nipping phase at 14-17 weeks, but as soon as she was old enough to go to the dog park she learned bite inhibition really fast.

[Brenna's Mom]

Linda, Bogart's mom, I agree with you. If a puppy is causing so much stress and family problems, the pup should be returned.
I am very, very lucky. Brenna chewed my hands and I yelled ouch. She no longer does it but I have an 11 year old lab/terrier mix who plays with Brenna about 3x a day, and they play hard. At first Kali wanted nothing to do with Brenna, but they are buds now.
She whined once during the first night, and has slept through ever since, I may hear a little bark during the night, but it's back to sleep.
To get her in her crate, I fill her Kong with peanut butter, she runs in there. During the day, the crate is in the living/great room and at night it goes in the bedroom. Kali sleeps on the bed with me. I lost my dear husband in March and I often wonder if Brenna is a reincarnation of him, he knows I would get only a female dog. .
I find if I talk to her calmly, she obeys better. If I get upset she gets rowdier.
As an aside, I took her for her final shots today, there were a lot of people there today and she was the star. She wiggled and wagged and made everyone there smile.
Who cannot smile looking at a doodle puppy?

[lindamarie]

Brenna's mom, I am so sorry for your loss and glad Brenna is helping through your grief process.
They are such wonderful dogs and they really, really do make people smile and kids giggle. It just gets BETTER!
I'm glad you're here with us!

[Brenna's Mom]

Linda, she makes me laugh. Yesterday she was outside and a Florida rain started coming down, I opened the door and she ran in then slid the length of the living room, I have tile, luckily.
She is house broken 99.99%. Started to pee today and I saw her then she went right outside to finish.
My name is Geri, and thank you for the kind words.

Geri

[Mbrwr]

Loui's Mom... I'm so sorry you're having such a hard time adjusting to having a puppy and I can absolutely relate to you... I have never had a dog. We lived in KY and I promised my kids that if we moved somewhere with no harsh winters I would get them a puppy so here we are. Loopy is 13 weeks old. He came home when he was 8 weeks... The breeder told us that we had 1 week to return him if we didn't adjust. Like you we got all prepared to bring him home.. we bought a crate, toys, holistic organic food, doggie bed, you name it... This dog had everything before he ever set a paw in this house but that first week after he came home all I could think about was how to tell my husband and kids that he needed to go back to his mommy! I couldn't handle a dog.. We love to take spur of the moment vacations, I'm always at school functions and sports and we like to eat out often... He couldn't be boarded for another 2 months, and there was the peeing and pooping and yelping in the middle of the night, not to mention I like my house clean and organized and he was going to mess everything up. How was I gonna tell them this was a terrible mistake and our lives wouldn't be the same?? It was like a bomb ticking away... I only had 7 days to return him and get my U$1200,00 back and the days were passing... When I finally told my husband I was having serious second thoughts about this he said "Calm down! It's just a dog!" I stopped to think about that... I didn't have to come up with every solution to every problem this puppy was going to cause right now! I decided to take one day at a time... I stopped obsessing about all that was in my future and started to enjoy this little ball of fur that soon is going to be 80lbs... And before I knew it the clock made it's last tick and suddenly it was day 8... he was ours for good...
I still have no idea how to raise a puppy but we're getting to know each other and I'm sure we'll figure it out together what we're supposed to do.
Here are some adjustments we've made...

- Loopy doesn't come in the house. We have a Florida room with tiled floors and that takes care of my clean house obsession.

-He's crate is also in the Florida room and that's used when he goes to bed and when we're out for a long period of time. Since he's still not trustworthy when he is unassisted he is tied to a 12ft long leash (in the Florida room) which gives him plenty of room to play and lay around. As long as he is tied down or in his crate he will not go potty indoors. In that radius there is also nothing he can chew on that doesn't belong to him.

- He loves going to the beach with us and taking car rides so we're learning how to have fun with him.

- Last weekend my vet kept him so we could spend the weekend out with the kids before they started school.

We switched foods 3 times, we had vomiting and diarrhea episodes, he's peed on my carpet, he's biting us but he's also growing and things will improve and we'll adjust.

Maybe if your husband would be whiling to help a little more or if you could find activities to do where the puppy could come along the kids would get more involved and enjoy having him around.

Just know that you're not alone for feeling like this.. Loopy has no idea how lucky he is that he's made to 13 weeks in our house and now all I can say is that even though there are countless question marks in our future regarding him, TODAY I'm very glad he is here.

[Daisy'sMom]

You've already gotten loads of replies and I'm certain by now you know that we can all agree that having a puppy is HARD WORK. I absolutely had a few moments of "what have we done!?!?!?" and "I want my old life back!!!" I can tell you, as with everyone else, give it time, be consistent and your hard work will pay off. The reward is priceless, I truly love our Daisy just a little more each day. She is an incredible dog with such a wonderful and loving personality. I can't even remember what life was like without her I just wanted to reiterate what everyone else said, that puppies are difficult and very demanding but it will get better. We crate trained Daisy which is hands down the best thing we could've done. As much as I didn't like doing this much, we would put Daisy in her crate everyday for a bit here and there when we were home, just so I could either get some things done or simply have a break. It's kind of like putting a baby down in their crib for a nap. I treated the whole process like a new baby basically, you have to figure out the routine that works best for you and your dog and you'll lose sleep for awhile but eventually your dog will be snoring away all night and into the morning w/o a peep When we wake up in the morning now Daisy is in her dog bed on our bedroom floor, totally on her back with all 4 legs in the air sound asleep, I swore at one time we'd never get to that point! It just takes time and every ounce of patience and energy that you can find within yourself.

Hang in there. And I agree with a few others, I think you should have a family discussion on helping and responsibility. I think it's very typical and common what you said about your 12yr old, they have no idea what it takes to care for and train a puppy, it all sounds like fun but it's more work than fun in the first few months. But you know what? In the end, guess who your puppy will love the most and come to more? You!!!! Not that that is what you want or are hoping for, but that will be your reward if your dog is like my Daisy. Daisy prefers me for most things and I have to admit I secretly love that about her, she knows who the mama is in our house

[lindamarie]

I wonder how Louie's mom is doing. She hasn't posted since mid-August.
Either things got better or perhaps she decided to take Louie back to the breeder??

[Brenna's Mom]

Lindamarie, I hope she is doing better.
Brenna is a joy compared to some of the horrors I have read.
Owners of new pups have to learn the the words NO and OFF. Brenna has been learning both. She sleeps in her crate at night, she is in it when I leave the house during the day.
She will be going to puppy school soon and will really learn because she is smart, and such a good pup. She just wants to be friends with everyone.
In a few days I will take her to the ocean, it should be fun.

[lindamarie]

Brenna's Mom........why do I get the feeling she may have given up? It really sounded like too much for her.
So happy for you and Brenna!
You have described a doodle very well! And the ocean!!!!! YIPPEEEEE! I love walking Bogart on the beaches of Lake Michigan. Most people think it's an ocean including ME! It looks like one, sounds like one!

Now.....be careful with those tender little paws. If you read my post on Bogart being pathetic and pitiful.......he hurt his paws in the deep sand. Maybe carry Brenna down to the hard packed sand????

[Mbrwr]

Loopy just LOVES the beach!!!! He loves to dig under my chair and seat there in the shade and when we take him to the water he just wants to go right in and faces the waves like he's been doing that his whole life hehehehe

[lindamarie]

Isn't it THE BEST!!!?

[maximo]

Thanks for sharing everyone. I don't feel alone on this matter or feel like I have a problem dog! Max is a great dog but he has started to get more aggressive with his biting especially with my 3 year old. I correct him and he gets more aggressive at times. I am nervous because I know one day he will be a big dog and he cannot behave that way. We correct him consistently in the same way and does back down most of the time but keeps doing it everyday. I monitor them and will never leave them alone together not even for 1 second! I too hope this is a phase. I know when Max and I are home alone- I work from home he is super calm. Lays at my feet, gets up to play but super calm. Max's turns into his alto ego when my daughter is around so I hope this will phase out in a few months. He is now sleeping thru the night. Last potty break at 11pm and does not get up until I go to potty until 630am. I think he would sleep in longer but he wakes up when I get up to go to my office. He does seem to want to be with me all the time. Crate training is going fine. He goes in twice through out the day for about 2.5 hrs. I leave the door open in the evening and last night he went in on his own to sleep. My biggest issue is the biting! Also he does not even care for his Kong. I tried peanut butter, etc. Any other good toys out there? Maybe the water bottle toy? I did give him a carrot ice cold or even frozen and that seems to help. But I can't feed him carrots all day!